- Joined
- Mar 27, 2010
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Hi everyone,
I'm new to SDN and am impressed by the outpouring of support and opportunity for discussion on this forum...
As my title says, I just turned 30 and will be starting intern year this summer. I've been in multiple serious relationships over the last decade and a half but am currently single (have been so for the last 1.5 years) and don't have any new prospects that I can foresee (I don't anticipate on having any time/energy to meet new people/date during intern year; furthermore, after intern year is over, I'll be starting residency at a small-program with 11/class, 70% of whom are already married based on what current residents there have told me). I don't mean to be overly dramatic and I don't mean to catastrophize my situation, nor can anyone ever predict the future (in my experience, relationships tend to 'happen' when you least expect them); but I feel like I've hit "a wall" that many women at this age do...and am afraid that my opportunities for marriage/family are dwindling, fast.
As far as life balance goes, I know that some are better at it than others. I've seen classmates of mine get married and/or pregnant during med school and residents who have done the same. That said, I personally cannot see myself being able to do that; if I couldn't handle a serious relationship during medical school, how am I supposed to do so during residency, let alone with marriage and kids? (kudos to those of you who are able to do so; I honestly don't know how you do it!). Best case scenario is if I meet someone after residency, but by then I'll be in my mid-30s and well...we all know the stats on pregnancy with aging. Should I give up the idea of ever having a family/kids and focus 100% on my career at this point? Or should I consider freezing my eggs or adopting in the future?...
The thought of living out the rest of my life single and alone greatly saddens me...and makes me feel at a loss with regard to achieving my personal life goals.
Thanks in advance for any input or thoughts.
I'm new to SDN and am impressed by the outpouring of support and opportunity for discussion on this forum...
As my title says, I just turned 30 and will be starting intern year this summer. I've been in multiple serious relationships over the last decade and a half but am currently single (have been so for the last 1.5 years) and don't have any new prospects that I can foresee (I don't anticipate on having any time/energy to meet new people/date during intern year; furthermore, after intern year is over, I'll be starting residency at a small-program with 11/class, 70% of whom are already married based on what current residents there have told me). I don't mean to be overly dramatic and I don't mean to catastrophize my situation, nor can anyone ever predict the future (in my experience, relationships tend to 'happen' when you least expect them); but I feel like I've hit "a wall" that many women at this age do...and am afraid that my opportunities for marriage/family are dwindling, fast.
As far as life balance goes, I know that some are better at it than others. I've seen classmates of mine get married and/or pregnant during med school and residents who have done the same. That said, I personally cannot see myself being able to do that; if I couldn't handle a serious relationship during medical school, how am I supposed to do so during residency, let alone with marriage and kids? (kudos to those of you who are able to do so; I honestly don't know how you do it!). Best case scenario is if I meet someone after residency, but by then I'll be in my mid-30s and well...we all know the stats on pregnancy with aging. Should I give up the idea of ever having a family/kids and focus 100% on my career at this point? Or should I consider freezing my eggs or adopting in the future?...
The thought of living out the rest of my life single and alone greatly saddens me...and makes me feel at a loss with regard to achieving my personal life goals.
Thanks in advance for any input or thoughts.